Monday, March 3, 2014

You Can't Tell Me What To Do...



Everyone has the right to their opinion. You don’t have to agree with each other, but you should respect each other. That’s where we tend to fail. There is an awful lot of finger pointing out there. There is a lot of arguing over political issues. A lot of “I’m right, you’re wrong.” I welcome arguments when they are based in scientific fact. If I argue the sky is green, you can retort with evidence that it is indeed blue (in appearance at least). You can argue with me that water freezes at 32 degrees Fahrenheit or make observations like, “We’ve had more days this winter below zero than any other winter in our recent history.”  These are all based in fact.

You cannot, however, tell me I am wrong in my opinion of the President, gun control, religion, gay rights, how I raise my boys, what I eat, etc. It is an OPINION and nothing you say will change my mind. My opinions are rooted in my own experiences. I am not RIGHT. But I HAVE the right to those opinions. We all do. I just wish we could all get along despite them.

Eric and I have friends on both sides of the political fence. Both of us are somewhere in the middle, so maybe that’s why we can have friends on the whole spectrum. Either that or we all just respect each other’s opinions.

I tell new mothers to listen to everyone’s advice because EVERYONE has advice, and then do whatever the hell they were going to do in the first place. I retaliated and put my boys to bed on their tummies. Guess what? They didn’t die. They didn’t have bald spots on the backs of their heads and they didn’t need to wear a helmet. They also started sleeping through the night before they were 2 months old. Yet people insist on making me feel bad about that choice.

Some people may not think I care about my boys, because I don’t smother them with attention and cater to their every whim. They would be wrong. I love them both with my whole heart. My goal in life is to create two adults who don’t freak out over the pressures in the real world, so I don’t coddle them at home. I’m teaching them to do their own laundry, clean the house, and make their own food. I’m making them independent. 

Someone berated me for my last post, asking where all the good stuff about the boys was. Well, this blog isn't about all the happy bullshit in my life. It’s not a way to just show the sunshine and ignore the rain. This is a blog about what is going on in my life, my opinions, etc. I will NEVER be one of those people who constantly posts on Facebook gushing about how much I love my kids. That's just me. I gush to my kids directly about how much I love them.  I don’t care what anyone else thinks. My kids know I love them and that I’m proud of them. They also know I can get frustrated with them. They NEED to know that. They aren't perfect. Neither am I. The sooner we learn this, the better life is going to be.

I find it very interesting to peruse Facebook to see what people's statuses are, or what articles they are posting, or what sites they comment on.  Today I was amused by a post about the 5 second rule, and how much gunk you are actually picking up on your dropped piece of food, and then it goes on to tell you a super duper ultra cleaning method. Frankly, I don’t care. Germs are good. Dog hair, is not. It depends on what I drop, on whether or not I will eat it. A pretzel? Sure!  An M&M? Absolutely!  A piece of toast, butter side down? Hell no.  I have a cold right now, but it’s not bad, and compared to how sick everyone else and their kids have been this winter, I will keep exposing myself to germs. My immune system thanks me. Some people are clean freaks and germaphobes and hypochondriacs. That's their right. I choose not to be. 

I also found an interesting post on food allergies and the 3 theories of why they happen. Heredity, the hygiene hypothesis (over cleaning too much), and the GMO theory. I know there is a HUGE movement to go away from GMO’s. According to that article and MANY others I have read, no one can actually find a link or a case in which a genetically modified food has actually hurt someone. (Please do not send me links to other articles that say the opposite. I don't care.) I personally vote for the hygiene hypothesis. Using my own kids as examples, their father and I have no known food allergies. Neither do the boys. So that shows heredity. They are eating all the same GMO stuff all the other kids out there are eating. Little Bobby can't eat peanuts, but my boys can. What’s the difference? Germs. I am a horrible housekeeper. I took both boys to Target before they were a week old, and Ty was just 2 days old. I never wiped down the carts. I only marginally cleaned off the stuff they stuck in their mouths at home and in public. Again, this is OPINION. This has absolutely no basis in fact. The only FACT is that they have no known food allergies. 

I have friends who are Catholics and friends who are atheists. I have friends who are Democrats, Republicans, and Independents. I have friends that are meat eaters, vegetarians and vegans. I personally think the latter two are CRAZY because meat is delicious, and I know all about how it ends up on my plate and I don’t care. But they absolutely have the right to eat what they want, and I will accommodate them any way I can. Because I love and respect them. I have friends who are cat lovers, friends who are dog lovers and friends who would rather not have any animals near them. I have friends that are stay at home moms and friends who are moms that work. I also have friends who don’t want kids, and I think that’s a wonderfully valid option.  That’s why we all have choices.

I will happily take suggestions on some things I could do better. But do not criticize the way I do something, or what I believe in. Do not tell me you are right and I am wrong on something that is OPINION. I may not like or agree with how you raise your kids, what you choose to eat, or that every post you put on FB refers God and how He is your Savior (because after growing up going to Catholic school, that is no longer my opinion), but I will respect it. In turn, I ask that you respect my opinions, beliefs and the way I live my life. You don’t have to agree with me. Just respect me.